My daughter is 10. It’s not a wonderful age, and my heart aches to know that there are many more non-fun years to come. Puberty has begun to remove all traces of the baby girl she always been, and soon will replace it with the woman she will be.

I want my girl to be fiercely independent. To aim for college and mention marriage as ‘someday’. I want to her to be comfortable in herself and not change for anyone. I want everyone else to see how wonderful she is. I see it, why can’t they?  And sometimes I even wish that things would be easy for her in life.

You would think all parent would want things ‘easy’ for their child. But for me, less so. I know that the times that make her cry will make her stronger. I know that every time she gets heart broke she will (hopefully) make better choices in relationships the next time around. But as a mother, watching your child struggle is heartbreaking. So sometimes, I wish for things to be easy for her.

But the one thing I do not wish for her is beauty. Oh, I think she is beautiful, even with the acne starting.  And I know she will turn out pretty, but I truly do not want her to be beautiful. Beautiful women aren’t taken seriously, things come easier for them (whether they wish it to be so or not), and beautiful women are expected to always be stunning. (How many times have you seen a woman whose beauty has faded and had a little bit of schadenfreude?).

I don’t hate beautiful women, and being a human, I must admit that I may even be the least bit envious of their looks. But still, I want my daughter to be pretty, with a beautiful heart, a stunning laugh, gorgeous compassion, and a knock-out sense of love. Now that I would really be jealous of.