When you are running a booth at a conference, and have access to the email list of attendees, it is PERFECTLY acceptable to send an email to those attendees to try to drum up interest in your booth and/ or product. But here are some guidelines when writing those emails:

1- Don’t write them like you just discovered all the cool things you can do with fonts. Make that noun green! Underline that one! Make that one red and italicaized! My daughter can write more professional emails than that.

2- Are you sure I care about your product? Cause you’re about 9 years too late since the last time I cared about breast pumps or sippy cups.

3- Are you tied in to a party I wasn’t invited to? Yeah, I’m a little resentful and jealous. Unless you’re handing out diamonds at your booth, I’m not coming.

4- Did you call me a Mommy Blogger in your email? Anytime I swear for five minutes after reading an email, it’s usually a sign that we are NOT going to hit it off professionally.

5- Does you message clash with mine? Well, OK, technically EVERYONE’S message clashes with mine. I’m like the plaid of blogger messages. You can’t ever find anything that goes with it. But still.

My point is, don’t spam me- TARGET me. And if I’m not in your target, it’s perfectly OK not to send me an email. We aren’t going to connect no matter what you do.

…

Oh, who am I kidding? I don’t care what’s in your email. I plan to spend all my time at the bar anyway.

Just heard today that they are making a reality show about Mommy Bloggers, and appartently they are going to be ‘casting’ while at BlogHer in couple of weeks. Now you just know I’ve got some issues with this. Let me spell them out for you:

1) Again, it’s that stereotype that if you are a female and a blogger then the only way to get noticed is to be a Mommy Blogger. What a crock of shite. Too many female bloggers are getting pushed to the side because they choose not write about their progeny’s latest/ cutest/ bestest first step/ first haircut/ first step/ breastfeeding. I don’t have anything against MommyBloggers, but for THE LOVE OF PETE, can we reconginze that there are lots of great female bloggers out there, doing all kinds of blogging- instead of focusing on this ONE clique. Ugh. Double ugh.

2) Ever been around Mommy Bloggers? They are like sharks in the water when they smell blood. You think the Real Housewives series women are vicious? You haven’t seen ANYTHING. Is this REALLY the face we want for bloggers? I know tons of  bloggers: mommy, daddy, techie, sex, etc. They are all wonderful and drama-free. Think those will be the type chosen for this series? THINK AGAIN.

3) Will they be chosen for their writing ability or their selling ability? Hey, just asking.

Stand by for LOTS of snark, complaints, and insights into this little slice of heaven.